We value your privacy.
This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience. You can learn more about our cookie usage in our privacy policy

I Use This 5-Minute Therapy Technique Every Day for My Anxiety

#
min read
5/16/2019
Courtesy of Tatiana Dyuvbanova / EyeEm / Getty Images

First, you have to understand what type of cognitive distortion is occurring. By

  • Healthline, Here's to a stronger, healthier world

By Sarah Aswell

I’ve lived with general anxiety for as far back as my memory goes. As a writer and stand-up comedian, I have the most trouble fighting against social and performance anxiety on a day-to-day basis, as I conduct interviews and interact with editors during the day and then take the stage at night.

My anxiety most often shows itself in what I call “anxiety hangovers,” when I wake up on the day following a social event or meeting or comedy show feeling horrible about everything I did or said — no matter how fun or successful the event felt the night before.

Everyone thinks you’re egotistical and obnoxious, my inner voice spits at me when I wake up.

You said the exact wrong thing to your friend when she asked for your opinion, because you never think before you open your mouth.

You dominated the dinner conversation. No wonder no one likes you.

You were so embarrassing on stage, of course you aren’t a success.

The mean little voice goes on and on and on.

After big events, like a friend’s wedding or important comedy show, I’ve had panic attacks the following morning: a racing heart, trembling hands, and trouble breathing. On other days, I just can’t concentrate because of the worry and feel mentally paralyzed, and the confidence I need to do my work is sunk.

Where cognitive behavioral therapy comes in

The central idea behind cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is extremely simple: If you change the way you think, you can change the way you feel.

But if feeling better and escaping depression and anxiety were that easy, we wouldn’t live in a country where psychological distress is increasing.

While I’ve found that I can’t fully eliminate or “cure” my anxiety (and probably never will), I’ve found a simple five-minute CBT exercise that quiets it down each day. My racing thoughts stop, my foggy brain begins to clear, and my fatigue lifts.

Suddenly, I feel like I can start my day.

Called the triple column technique, which was developed and named by clinical psychiatrist Dr. David D. Burns, all it does is change my mindset. But sometimes, this shift is enough to completely shut my anxiety up for the day. A change in how we think about ourselves is all we really need to find a calmer, happier place.

Recognizing cognitive distortions

In 2014, a friend recommended Burns’ “Feeling Good,” a CBT classic that takes readers step-by-step through recognizing negative self-talk, analyzing it rationally, and replacing it with healthier and more accurate thinking.

(Burns also suggests, for many people living with anxiety and depression, to see their doctor and pair therapy and the appropriate medication if deemed necessary.)

The book made it crystal clear that I wasn’t a secretly bad person and incredible failure who can’t do anything right. I’m just a pretty regular person who has a brain that can distort reality and cause way too much anxiety, stress, and depression.

The first big lesson was to learn the specifics of cognitive distortions — those statements that the little voice makes about who I am and what’s going on in my life.

There are 10 big distortions that can occur:

  1. All or nothing thinking. When you see things in black and white instead of in shades of gray. Example: I’m a bad person.
  2. Overgeneralization. When you extend a negative thought so it reaches even further. Example: I never do anything right.
  3. Mental filter. When you filter out all the good stuff to focus on the bad. Example: I didn’t accomplish anything today.
  4. Disqualifying the positive. When you believe a good or positive thing “doesn’t count” toward your larger pattern of failure and negativity. Example: I guess I survived the talk — even broken clocks are right twice a day.
  5. Jumping to conclusions. When you extrapolate an even bigger and broader negative thought from a small negative experience. Example: He said he didn’t want to go out with me. I must be an unlovable person.
  6. Magnification or minimization. When you exaggerate your own mistakes (or other people’s accomplishments or happiness) while minimizing your own accomplishments and others’ flaws. Example: Everyone saw me mess up at the game, while Susan had a perfect night on the field.
  7. Emotional reasoning. When you assume your negative feelings reflect the truth. Example: I felt embarrassed, therefore I must have been acting in an embarrassing manner.
  8. Should statements. When you beat yourself up for not doing things differently. Example: I should’ve kept my mouth shut.
  9. Labeling and mislabeling. When you use a small negative event or feeling to give yourself a huge, general label. Example: I forgot to do the report. I’m a total idiot.
  10. Personalization. When you make things personal that aren’t. Example: The dinner party was bad because I was there.

How to use the 5-minute triple column techniqueOnce you understand the 10 most common cognitive distortions, you can start taking a few minutes a day to complete the triple column exercise.While you can do it in your head, it works amazingly better if you write it down and get that negative voice out of your head — believe me.Here’s how you do it:

  1. Make three columns on a sheet of paper, or open an Excel document or Google Spreadsheet. You can do it anytime you’d like, or just when you’re noticing you’re beating yourself up. I like to write mine in the morning when I’m feeling most anxious, but many people I know write theirs before bed to clear their minds.
  2. In the first column, write what Burns calls your “automatic thought.” That’s your negative self-talk, that crappy, mean little voice in your head. You can be as brief or detailed as you’d like. Yours might read, My workday was the worst. My presentation bombed, my boss hates me, and I’ll probably get fired.
  3. Now read your statement (it always looks kind of shocking to see it in print) and look for the cognitive distortions to write in the second column. There may be just one or more than one. In the example we’re using, there are at least four: overgeneralization, all or nothing thinking, mental filter, and jumping to conclusions.
  4. Finally, in the third column, write your “rational response.” This is when you think logically about what you’re feeling and rewrite your automatic thought. Using our example, you might write, My presentation could’ve gone better, but I’ve had lots of successful presentations in the past and I can learn from this one. My boss was confident enough to have me lead the presentation, and I can talk to her tomorrow about how it could’ve gone better. There’s no evidence at all that this one subpar day at work would get me fired.

You can write as many or as few automatic thoughts as you want. After a good day, you might not have any, and after a big event or conflict, you might have to work through a lot.

I’ve found that after years of doing this, I’m much better at catching my brain in the middle of a distortion and much more comfortable in recognizing that, at best, my negative talk isn’t rational at all. At worst, it’s exaggerated or overdramatic.

And is it proven to work?

A 2012 meta-analysis of 269 studies about CBT found that while this simple talk therapy is most helpful in combination with other treatments, it’s very successful when specifically treating anxiety, anger management, and stress management. Go forth and fill out your triple columns!

Follow us here and subscribe here for all the latest news on how you can keep Thriving.

Stay up to date or catch-up on all our podcasts with Arianna Huffington here.

Originally published on Healthline.

Book Your Space Now

Coworking desks, private offices, meeting rooms and training rooms for individuals and teams, ready to book when you need them.

BOOK NOW
Google now lets you pick your favorite sources.
Add as Google Preferred Source
Add WorkSocial to Preferred Sources

Related Spaces

Conference room with table and chairs for a standard team meeting
capactiy
Madison Avenue Forum Room

515 Madison Ave 8th Floor
New York, NY 10022

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a producer-style working session
capactiy
Broadway Producer's Suite

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and executive seating for a director-level meeting
capactiy
Broadway Director's Suite

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating designed to spark new ideas
capactiy
Times Square Inspiration Room

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and chairs for a high-energy team session
capactiy
Times Square Energy Room

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a senior leadership meeting
capactiy
Herald Square Executive Room

31 West 34th Street, 7th & 8th Floors
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Large conference room with table and seating for a big-group meeting
capactiy
Madison Grand Room

315 Madison Avenue 3rd & 4th Floors
New York, NY 10017

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a strategic planning session
capactiy
Madison Strategy Room

315 Madison Avenue 3rd & 4th Floors
New York, NY 10017

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a leadership team meeting
capactiy
Madison Leadership Room

315 Madison Avenue 3rd & 4th Floors
New York, NY 10017

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a detail-focused meeting
capactiy
Financial District Precision Room

30 Broad St 14th floor
New York, NY 10004

Explore location
Conference room with table and chairs suited for strategy discussions
capactiy
Financial District Strategy Room

30 Broad St 14th floor
New York, NY 10004

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a big-picture planning session
capactiy
Chelsea Horizon Room

159 W 25th St Floors 4, 5, 7 & 8
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating built for innovation workshops
capactiy
Chelsea Innovation Room

159 W 25th St Floors 4, 5, 7 & 8
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a close-partner discussion
capactiy
Chelsea Partner Room

159 W 25th St Floors 4, 5, 7 & 8
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a creative team session
capactiy
Chelsea Creative Room

159 W 25th St Floors 4, 5, 7 & 8
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating in a bold, standout setting
capactiy
Fashion District Icon Room

15 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating in an elegant, refined setting
capactiy
Fashion District Elegance Room

15 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating in an artistic, atelier-style space
capactiy
Fashion District Atelier Room

15 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating fit for a runway-inspired setting
capactiy
Fashion District Runway Room

15 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating in a stylish, design-forward space
capactiy
Fashion District Design Room

15 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a mid-sized team meeting
capactiy
Midtown West Rio Room

109 West 39th Street, 2nd Floor
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating suited for strategic planning
capactiy
Times Square Vision Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating suited for creative brainstorming
capactiy
Times Square Catalyst Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with boardroom table and chairs near Times Square
capactiy
Times Square Momentum Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for an interactive team session
capactiy
Times Sq South Catalyst Room

1441 Broadway Floors 3, 5 and 6
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and chairs for a small, focused meeting
capactiy
Times Sq South Harmony Room

1441 Broadway Floors 3, 5 and 6
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating built for forward-looking planning
capactiy
Times Sq South Vision Room

1441 Broadway Floors 3, 5 and 6
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and chairs arranged for a team meeting
capactiy
Times Sq South Momentum Room

1441 Broadway Floors 3, 5 and 6
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and chairs for a small, dedicated work session
capactiy
Times Sq South Focus Room

1441 Broadway Floors 3, 5 and 6
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and chairs for a focused strategy session
capactiy
Times Sq South Strategy Room

1441 Broadway Floors 3, 5 and 6
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating built for strategic team sessions
capactiy
Lexington Avenue Strategy Suite

369 Lexington Ave 3rd floor
New York, NY 10017

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating suited for group decision-making
capactiy
Lexington Avenue Council Suite

369 Lexington Ave 3rd floor
New York, NY 10017

Explore location
Conference room with executive table and seating for a formal meeting
capactiy
Lexington Avenue Executive Suite

369 Lexington Ave 3rd floor
New York, NY 10017

Explore location
Conference room with table and lounge-style seating for a relaxed meeting
capactiy
Madison Avenue Summer Loft

515 Madison Ave 8th Floor
New York, NY 10022

Explore location
Conference room with polished table and seating for a formal meeting
capactiy
Madison Avenue Sterling Suite

515 Madison Ave 8th Floor
New York, NY 10022

Explore location
Conference room with boardroom table suited for executive discussions
capactiy
Madison Avenue Regent Suite

515 Madison Ave 8th Floor
New York, NY 10022

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating suited for leadership decisions
capactiy
Madison Avenue Dominion Suite

515 Madison Ave 8th Floor
New York, NY 10022

Explore location
Conference room with a formal boardroom table and seating
capactiy
Wall Street Board Room

40 Wall St Floor 28
New York, NY 10005

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a high-stakes business deal
capactiy
Wall Street Deal Room

40 Wall St Floor 28
New York, NY 10005

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating built for leadership sessions
capactiy
Wall Street Leadership Room

40 Wall St Floor 28
New York, NY 10005

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a high-performing team session
capactiy
Herald Square Performance Room

31 West 34th Street, 7th & 8th Floors
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating for a group collaboration session
capactiy
Herald Square Collaboration Room

31 West 34th Street, 7th & 8th Floors
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating in a prestige-style setting
capactiy
Herald Square Prestige Room

31 West 34th Street, 7th & 8th Floors
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating suited for a training-linked meeting
capactiy
Broadway TL Room

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with lounge seating suited for creative team sessions
capactiy
Broadway Lounge Creativity Room

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with lounge seating designed to spark inspiration
capactiy
Broadway Lounge Inspiration Room

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with lounge seating for a relaxed collaborative session
capactiy
Broadway Lounge Collaboration Room

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating built for big-picture strategy
capactiy
The Hudson Vision Room

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating set up for a group assembly
capactiy
Broadway Assembly Room

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with formal boardroom table and executive seating
capactiy
Broadway Clinton Suite

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Podcast studio with microphones, mixing board, and soundproofed walls
capactiy
Nomad Podcast Studio

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating in a heritage-style setting
capactiy
Archway Heritage Suite

9-15 Elthorne Rd, Archway
London N19 4AJ, UK

Explore location
Soundproofed podcast studio with microphones and recording equipment
capactiy
Archway Podcast Studio

9-15 Elthorne Rd, Archway
London N19 4AJ, UK

Explore location
Open coworking desks and shared seating in a bright, vibrant office
capactiy
Vibrant Vision Loft

9-15 Elthorne Rd, Archway
London N19 4AJ, UK

Explore location
Coworking desks and lounge area in an executive-style office suite
capactiy
Madison Avenue Executive Loft

515 Madison Ave 8th Floor
New York, NY 10022

Explore location
Open coworking desks and shared seating in a financial district office
capactiy
Wall Street Strategy Hub

40 Wall St Floor 28
New York, NY 10005

Explore location
Coworking desks and seating in a polished, upscale office lounge
capactiy
Lexington Avenue Prestige Lounge

369 Lexington Ave 3rd floor
New York, NY 10017

Explore location
Shared coworking desks with natural light and open seating
capactiy
Madison Classic Harmony Suite

315 Madison Avenue 3rd & 4th Floors
New York, NY 10017

Explore location
Shared coworking desks and collaborative seating near shopping district
capactiy
Herald Square Collaboration Studio

31 West 34th Street, 7th & 8th Floors
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Coworking desks and shared seating with a modern, precision-built layout
capactiy
Financial District Precision Loft

30 Broad St 14th floor
New York, NY 10004

Explore location
Shared coworking desks and seating in a bright, creative-district office
capactiy
Chelsea Collective Space

159 W 25th St Floors 4, 5, 7 & 8
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Coworking desks and lounge seating in a bright, open studio
capactiy
Times Sq South Momentum Studio

1441 Broadway Floors 3, 5 and 6
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Coworking desks and shared seating in a quiet, suburban office setting
capactiy
Suburban Focus Studio

330 Changebridge Rd Suite 101

Pine Brook, NJ 07058

Explore location
Coworking desks and open seating in a bright, modern office lab
capactiy
Skyline Innovation Lab

Parsippany, NJ

Explore location
Corporate training room with rows of seating and a presentation screen
capactiy
Times Square Vision Lab

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for a collective workshop
capactiy
Broadway Collective Hub

1216 Broadway
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for an influence-building workshop
capactiy
Madison Avenue Influence Lab

515 Madison Ave 8th Floor
New York, NY 10022

Explore location
Large corporate training room with rows of seating for an enterprise session
capactiy
Madison Avenue Drive Training Room

515 Madison Ave 8th Floor
New York, NY 10022

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs bathed in natural light
capactiy
Madison Avenue Radiance Room

515 Madison Ave 8th Floor
New York, NY 10022

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for a harmonious team workshop
capactiy
Madison Avenue Harmony Studio

515 Madison Ave 8th Floor
New York, NY 10022

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs set for a strategy session
capactiy
Wall Street Strategy Suite

40 Wall St Floor 28
New York, NY 10005

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs overlooking a skyline view
capactiy
Lexington Avenue Skyline Room

369 Lexington Ave 3rd floor
New York, NY 10017

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating built for forward-thinking teams
capactiy
Herald Square Innovation Room

31 West 34th Street, 7th & 8th Floors
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Conference room with table and seating built to spark ideas
capactiy
Herald Square Inspiration Room

31 West 34th Street, 7th & 8th Floors
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Large corporate training room with rows of seating for a powerhouse session
capactiy
Chelsea Powerhouse Studio

159 W 25th St Floors 4, 5, 7 & 8
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for a high-impact workshop
capactiy
Chelsea Impact Room

159 W 25th St Floors 4, 5, 7 & 8
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Large corporate training room with rows of seating for a big group
capactiy
Chelsea Legend Studio

159 W 25th St Floors 4, 5, 7 & 8
New York, NY 10001

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for a balanced team session
capactiy
Fashion District Harmony Suite

15 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for a fast-paced workshop
capactiy
Fashion District Rhythm Studio

15 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs in an elegant, formal setting
capactiy
Fashion District Elegance Hall

15 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for a visionary planning session
capactiy
Times Sq South Visionary Studio

1441 Broadway Floors 3, 5 and 6
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for an interactive session
capactiy
Times Sq South Catalyst Lab

1441 Broadway Floors 3, 5 and 6
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for a team momentum session
capactiy
Times Sq South Momentum Room

1441 Broadway Floors 3, 5 and 6
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for a legacy-building session
capactiy
Midtown West Legacy Room

109 West 39th Street, 2nd Floor
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Corporate training room with tables and chairs for a masterclass-style session
capactiy
Midtown West Mastery Lounge

109 West 39th Street, 2nd Floor
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Large corporate training room with rows of seating for a leadership event
capactiy
Midtown West Leadership Lab

109 West 39th Street, 2nd Floor
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Large corporate training room with rows of seating for discovery-focused learning
capactiy
Midtown West Breakthrough Hub

109 West 39th Street, 2nd Floor
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Training room for rent at WorkSocial Midtown West NYC, 109 W 39th St, seats up to 100.
capactiy
Midtown West Discovery Studio

109 West 39th Street, 2nd Floor
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Coworking desks and open seating in a stylish, design-forward office
capactiy
Fashion District Style Loft

15 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Corporate training room for rent in Midtown West NYC at 109 W 39th St, seats up to 80.
capactiy
Midtown West Creative Suite

109 West 39th Street, 2nd Floor
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Large corporate training venue in Midtown West NYC at 109 W 39th St, seats up to 200
capactiy
Midtown West Inspiration Hall

109 West 39th Street, 2nd Floor
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Corporate training room rental at 330 Changebridge Rd, Pine Brook NJ, seats up to 70
capactiy
Oasis Growth Studio

330 Changebridge Rd Suite 101

Pine Brook, NJ 07058

Explore location
Private office with two desks and seating for a two-person team
capactiy
Synergy Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Private office with two desks facing a window view
capactiy
Partner Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Private office suite with table and seating for ten people
capactiy
Leadership Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Private office with long conference table and chairs for ten people
capactiy
Summit Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Private office with conference table and seating for ten people
capactiy
Enterprise Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Private office with table and seating for four people
capactiy
Strategy Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Private office with four desks arranged for team collaboration
capactiy
Collaboration Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location
Private office with desk and chair for one person in a modern coworking suite
capactiy
Solo Focus Suite

240 W 40th St Floors 2 & 3
New York, NY 10018

Explore location